El Kiwi en Sudamérica

Good times…
As most of my blog posts seem to be incident related, I don’t have a whole lot to write about this time, so I guess I should write some compelling anecdotes of the ‘mundane/normal’ things that happen around me, and maybe some incisive social commentary if I can get in the mood. Consequently this blog will probably be even more disjointed than usual.
I quite like useless lists… let me treat you to The 10 Things I’ll miss when I go home, and The 10 Things I won’t miss when I get home.

So in no particular order of preference:

The 10 things I’ll miss when I get home

1. The ever-present sound of Reggaeton and other forms of Latin music blaring all over the place
2. The oh so cheap buses that fill the city, for less than 30 cents NZ (60 centavos) a ride – and a smaller "carbon footprint"* to boot
3. The brilliant cuisine that is rich in flavour, and a lot better than Chilean fare (excluding the magnificent empanadas and completos)
4. All the chicas bonitas here (and in Chile and Argentina as well, of course)
5. The almost always sunny weather
6. Inca Cola, la bebida del Perú
7. Having the Language barrier as an excuse for misdemeanours and mistakes
8. Following Futból, esp. the passion and fun times watching live
9. The wonderful E-café down the road. Where I go, almost daily, to chill out and browse the net etc. for the price of around about 50 cents an hour. I also treat myself each time to a bottle of Inca kola/fanta/kola real for only around about 30 cents
10. Cheap stuff: clothing, bootleg mp3 cds, dvds of the latest movies**, food, bus travel, taxis… it goes on and on.

You may have noticed that I have put down specific people. I don’t regard people as things, and if I put them on the list would have to be huge.
*Personally, I’m in the sceptic camp in regards to the Human element in global warming, for the record. The hysteria has seemed to escalate 20 fold from a year ago, or even more. But I’m all for saving energy, from a ‘green’ and economic perspective- but unfortunately I can see this hysteria hurting the third world, in regards to them enjoying and benefiting from developing, the price of goods such as coal etc. in the market, and in unfair pressure with threats to hurt exports etc.
**I regard my purchases of pirated stuff as my part in the protest of the locals against unreasonable prices in these kind of countries. These big companies are too narrow-minded to fix prices at a reasonable level for the locals, which fuels the copying of product. You can tell when the prices are too high when piracy is wide spread to the point where real copies are hard to come bye, even rental places don’t exist. So, I have stood up for the oppressed and helped them in their struggle against this corruption. Which reminds me I need to get some more movies to practice my Spanish. The learning method I use is to watch the movie first in English with Spanish subtitles, then in the dubbed version-it works a treat, except when the end of the movie is cut off (I’m still somewhat in the dark as to what happens after the old guy in the new James Bond movie is shot in the leg- I’m pretty sure that’s very close to the end…I’m looking forward to Spiderman 3 hahaha
(I guess I did get in the mood for social commentary after all!)
Ok, On to the next list

10 things I won’t miss…

1. Having to put used toilet paper in the rubbish bin beside the loo, instead of the way God designed it- flush it down! It has something to do with the design of the toilet, and the sewage systems that can’t handle paper and… the other stuff
2. Quite possibly the most annoying thing would have to be this: after meeting a (fluent in Spanish) foreigner from a non-English speaking country, and starting the conversation in Spanish – and relatively fluently I might add. Then the other person asks me where I’m from, and when they find out it’s an English speaking country, they switch to English-which I take as an insult to my intelligence and ability in the language… quite an unfair and unnecessary put-down- even though my ability is not affecting the conversation in any way… which makes me so want to tell them ******* ******* ** ******! (Well not really all that... but something might pop out) It really ticks me off. I know they never had that problem, as what percentage of the foreigners here speak their language! This hasn’t happened to me that often, but it really grates me – I should prepare a slightly harsh phrase in Spanish that sounds extremely fluent…. Brooohahahahaaha (excuse me for this point, my blood was really boiling at the time, but it does capture my feelings somewhat)
3. This following snap shot of a conversation has happened to me so many times, it’s quite strange how often this happens (generally with, dare I say, less educated people without much knowledge of other countries):
Random person: "Where are you from?"
Me: Nueva Zelanda (New Zealand of course)
R.P: "Holanda?"
Me: "No, (slowly) nueva zelanda"
R.P: "Is it in Europe?"
Me: "No, in Oceania, near Australia"
Which, sometimes leads to: "do you have kangaroos"
4. Not being able to watch Rugby (I caught some All Blacks games in Chile, but I’m not sure if they show them here)
5. Not being able to buy Hair-wax (Maribel hasn’t got me some yet, and I’m sceptical that it’ll be the good stuff
6. Making embarrassing mistakes in Spanish, that make me look like a real idiot… all too often- though they haven’t had the comedy that sometimes comes, like this example when someone that Anthony knows mistook ‘empanada’ (a savoury pastry) and ‘empleada’ (Woman that works in the house, like a maid really) when he said this hilarious sentence:
"I like my empleadas hot" (of course he was trying to refer to the food… although he has a very valid point that he made!)
The only personal example I can think of is when I was in Chile staying at Omar and Waldo’s place, when I called the kitchen (la cocina) ‘la cochina’ which means ‘filthy, dirty’ but more specifically in regards to humans, and I was using the feminine form of the word as well…
7. The earthquakes: A few weeks back we had quite a big shake, which didn’t phase me that much, but if it got any stronger I would’ve freaked out. To my credit I preformed better that some foreigners here who run outside in panic (supposedly my German friends I went to the beach did just that, I can so picture them doing it!!! Hahaha)
8. Being on a bus that’s full to overflowing with smelly people. Not at all pleasant.
9. People thinking I’m tall, and the small space between the seats, low roofs that make them look like they have a point. It’s also a hassle to get shoes, esp. cheap ones. It does have its advantages though, in crowds especially.
10. Crime: Thankfully I’ve only been affected personally once (and was part of the reason. see the blog entry about my trip here). But it’s something to worry about, as I always here stories of peoples near misses or times they were robbed. One day I was in the bus and I heard some woman shouting, I looked outside to see someone running off with a lady’s handbag, and, much to the disgust of the people inside the bus, no one helped or noticed it quick enough to stop him. The rest of the trip I was thinking of what I’d have done if I were in the position to help. I guess (if I was in a noble mood) chased after the dude and nailed him, or if he was running toward me clothesline him or something (you can tell I’m missing Rugby, right?). But you never know if someone has a knife or if he has friends. But I could possibly count on the ‘mob justice’ culture that is prevalent here to stir up bystanders… I’ve obviously thought about this too much.


Well, that was some serious cathartic therapy there, but it was getting fairly hard to remember negative stuff (though I got fairly heated up at times). But, I think I’ve only realized recently how long a year is away from the fam – even though the wonders of video calls on skype almost make me feel as if I’m home, but then when I get off then I feel as if I’m transported instantaneously to the other side of the world. So here’s a big shout out to my family: Miss you guys heaps, I look forward to being really there in three months. (Don’t read into that sentence that I’m homesick or anything, but after having completed over ¾ of my trip, I’m starting to feel that time is running out, which gives me feelings of sadness mixed with anticipation of the next journey, whatever that entails).

The next instalment of the blog will/should have (D.V) extensive coverage of the selling of Anti-cuchos (kinda like a kebab thing on a stick)with the youth group to raise money for the foodstuffs we are giving the mums on Mothers day. Hopefully I’ll take some mean video footage as well.
In a few weeks there’ll be a baptismal service, which will be tight, as quite a number are getting baptised.
I may also be heading to Lima in a few weeks time with the Greens, as Anthony needs to renew his passport- so we’ll spend a few days there- should be "good times".
Look after yourselves, keep it real, peace out, Kia kaha, or whatever ending phrase you happen to fancy.
Nathan

posted by Nathan Sinclair @ 12:08 PM